Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize