Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
