im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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