i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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