It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Can I color on your dick again?
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Randomize
