actually, I'm a sock model
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Randomize
