please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
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