I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
