remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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