This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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