3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
You dont lie about slip and slides
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
