the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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