just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
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