just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
