exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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