Umm I'm too high to move.
he shaved USA in his pubs
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
You dont lie about slip and slides
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
