one two three fourrrrnication!
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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