Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
