Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
