Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Randomize