I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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