Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
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