Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
