She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Randomize