There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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