At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Randomize
