OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Randomize
