i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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