So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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