I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
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