Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Randomize
