Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
