After last night, I could never be a politician.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Randomize