Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
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