She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
