Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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