So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
