So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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