I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
