i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Randomize
