gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Randomize
