alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
