Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Randomize
