Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
