either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
