"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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