you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
