Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
