wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize