I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Randomize